03rd April 2008

Following on from my posts about wanting a Golden Retriever, we returned home from last weekends NLP Foundation weekend to find a email from the breeder that we had been to visit. ‘Secret’, the mum dog, has given birth to 8 little puppies, 3 male and 5 female. She sent through the picture below:

They look a little like large slugs at the moment, but we go to visit them on 24th April when they have grown up a little bit. Kate is still not fully convinced that we should have one, but I am working on it… Wait till she sees the puppies!

Toby x

03rd April 2008

A little bit on my new book: The most basic form of learning is association. As babies, we learn to associate a mother’s touch with food, comfort and security. As children, we learn to avoid unpleasant situations by learning to associate darkness with fear or telling off with naughtiness etc.

Pain and gain are the most basic building blocks of our memory though. They serve as vital points of reference for understanding the world and coping with different situations.

Once you cut yourself or burn a finger, it’s very hard to forget the danger posed by sharp or hot objects. Similarly, it’s hard to forget the yummy colours and flavours of your favorite candy.

For children, these associations are simple and pretty basic. As we learn and observe, these simple associations are replaced with complex, inter-connected webs of information that gradually increase in detail and complexity - overlapping intricate thoughts and sensations.

An isolated thought or feeling can serve as a “memory trigger”, evoking a series of associated memories - like the pieces of a jig-saw puzzle that fit into each other to complete the picture. The smell of a charcoal fire might evoke childhood memories of barbecue nights, family, friends, school and summer holidays. The sound of the Doctor Who theme tune for example may evoke some other memories of hiding behind the sofa as a child. These are associations that trigger your memory to kick into action.

These associations are of course made at an unconscious level and are ‘anchored’ in, trapped until they are triggered to spring up.

What happens when we start to make conscious and willful memory-associations? What happens when we employ carefully-chosen memory triggers to facilitate recall?

Well, to answer these questions I decided to write a short book entitled ‘Mastering memory’. I think it’s pretty good and the techniques are really fantastic. The book has been published and you can find it on Amazon, or by clicking here. All of the money raised from my book will go direct to Global Angels - a charity Kate and I are ambassadors for who help feed and educate children all over the world. (www.globalangels.org).

Toby x

24th March 2008

Located in a peaceful valley on the banks of the river Esk in Scotland, 15 miles from our new home in Lockerbie, Kagyu Samye Ling was the first Tibetan Buddhist Centre to have been established in the West. It is a centre for wisdom and learning within the Karma Kagyu tradition of Tibetan Buddhism. Samye Ling is a monastery and international centre of Buddhist training, known for the authenticity of its teachings and tradition. It offers instruction in Buddhist philosophy and meditation within the Karma Kagyu lineage of Tibetan Buddhism. It is also a centre for the preservation of Tibetan religion, culture, medicine, art, architecture and handicrafts. The Easter weekend break gave Kate and I an ideal opportunity to introduce our two best friends from Bristol to Samye Ling, and their first experience into Buddhist tradition.

Buddhism has fascinated me for many years. The practice of Buddhism sits nicely with my values and beliefs - The practice of doing no harm, performing wholesome actions and training our mind through meditation. There seems to me to be many similarities between Buddhism, Quantum Theory and NLP, although I am keen to point out that all three are not religious followings or indeed are not the same thing.

I point this out because I got a fright a few months ago when at the end of a NLP Foundation weekend training, a student asked me whether I thought it would be best for him to take our NLP course, or join a Scientology group. I almost collapsed… With the greatest respect to Scientology - of which I know very little about - the two are VERY different. It was like asking me whether I liked to eat oranges or Liver - both are very different to me. What interested me though was his perception of the two and the way he connected them together. It turned out that he had already read a lot about Scientology and was wanting to “match up” ‘NLP’ with his new found ‘religion’. With strong filters in place, it was difficult for him to see the two as two separate subjects.

I have been nagging Kate for some months now to get a dog. I love dogs and particularly want a Golden retriever. Every time I see one I like to point it out to Kate to spark off a conversation where I can influence Kate on how nice having a dog would be. Kate, the astute one in our marriage, is a little more dubious about having a dog as a pet, and thinks more about the restriction this might put on us… My filters on having the dog are so strong that I struggle to see the pit falls - I only see the benefits, whereas on the reverse, Kate struggles to find the benefits of having a dog and focuses in on the pit falls…

While Hayley and Mike were staying with us over the weekend I decided to book a visit in with a local Golden Retriever breeder - I thought this might be an ideal opportunity for Kate to be influenced in my direction to get a dog. If I could change her filters by making the benefits clearer than the pit falls then I was in with a chance of walking away with a puppy… I know that Hayley and Mike are both dog lovers too and would be all cute about the dogs, so the odds were in my favour. The visit went well and the dogs were beautiful. When we talked through having a dog again last night Kate seems to now be swayed towards having a dog. It seems her ‘dog’ filters have changed and are now in place to seek out the benefits, and negate the problems. There’s still work to do and I will keep you up to date on progress…

I’m curious to explore the differences between the ease of changing a personal filter, belief or value about getting a dog for example, over changing a filter on religion or strong, lasting belief. Is it just a simple case of stacking benefits onto one religion or belief over another to influence people in a certain direction, or is there more too it?

Toby x

18th March 2008

We have been asked so many times about the ‘green sludge’ that we drink on trainings… I thought it was about time we let you know where you can get the same… Kate and I have been taking it now for over 3 months and I can honestly say - we feel great because of it (and our own minds of course). It’s full of every seed, grass and goodness that we usually don’t get in our diets and it really does make you feel energised.

The website is: http://www.energiseforlife.com/

and… If you type this reference into the discount code when you order, you get 5% off: REF025

I believe Anthony Robbins takes it and if it’s good enough for him… Well, you know!

Toby x

14th March 2008

Kate and I have been learning about quantum theory over the last few months and I have to say it’s not as scary as we thought it might be. Did you know that every breath you take contains atoms breathed out by Genghis Khan and Elvis Presley… And… The faster you travel, the slimmer you get… It’s a weird and wonderful world in the quantum world… As well as learning weird facts about us humans, we have managed to apply a lot of our new quantum knowledge into our training courses. The Master Practitioner will now completely blow your mind… There are numerous books on the subject of quantum theory, many are way beyond my ‘capacity of a tadpole brain’ to understand. One of the best I have read is called “quantum theory cannot hurt you” by Marcus Chown. He offers an illuminating view of our universe.

Toby x